Am soon going to be 25, as most would say, this rant is about my quarter life crisis... but the way we live today, I think I should consider this the half way mark.. Anything over that would, by me, be considered a bonus life!
A lot of people achieve a lot in these 25 years... they set goals, reach up to the set aims... get a good job, start a business, buy their first cars, fall in and out of love, get married, start a family, for the first time sponsor their trips.. Others make space for their hobbies, shower time and material on their parents and siblings, spend on comforts and live a life!
Most of the 25 year olds, if not already there, at least know where they are headed.
I have a done a lot of those things too! But I think I still have no aim that I have to achieve... I have no goals that have to be converted! I have no mark that needs to be crossed!
And no, don’t take me wrong! The last quarter of my life has been very happening, very dynamic and to me, pretty satisfying! Am content with what all I’ve done in those 25 years!
I have been a high achiever, I have been a mediocre, and I’ve been a loser too!
I’ve been loved, I’ve been liked, I’ve been hated, I’ve been loathed!..
I’ve been desired, I’ve been ignored!
I’ve been happy, I’ve been sad!
I’ve shed tears in pain, I have cried in happiness!
I’ve lost people to death; I’ve found jewels in birth!
I’ve been cheated on, I’ve had my back watched!
I’ve been tricked, I’ve been treated!
I’ve been my dad's princess, my mom's pride... I’ve even put them both to shame.
Been stingy, been a spendthrift
Been mean, been sweet
There are so many bucket lists out there telling you what you ought to have done in life by now!
I don’t care what they say, yet I know they talk about living a carefree life!
When I think of things I would have wanted to do by now, I don’t have regrets!
If I say I have no regrets, and I have been pretty satisfied with my life so far, why is it that I call it a quarter life crisis?!
Because I somewhere know that there are things for which I’ll be too old very soon!
There are some that only I could do something about, and there are some only you could do something about!
• I have nothing that I am a master at! Am a jack of many trades, but nothing that I command!
• I have for long considered round a shape, it’s now or never that I could experiment with another
• I have no identified strengths
• I haven’t yet taken my revenge, she’ll be too old to harm soon
• I haven’t painted my master piece yet!
• I haven’t bungee jumped!
• I haven’t been on a walk to see undersea life
• I haven’t made it to a first class basketball team
• I really haven’t stood up enough for me
• There is still a language I need to learn
• My time freezing machine is still in blueprint stage
• I still don’t have that room with a bean bag and lots of canvases, the empty coffee mugs and the window that looks over to unending green space
It’s this year, or I never ever will get a chance to do this, any which way!
But more than what I could have done, I have desires that would look foolish beyond a certain age
• As much as I love surprises, I haven’t braced a single one till today
• Pampering that I would have loved being a girl, a daughter, a girlfriend: the gifts, the walks, the candle lights, the pride, the presents, the understood ties!
• The orchids, the birds of paradise, the cut flower roses and the tulips that would soothe all eyes
I’ve been happy being me, being different, and being ‘ajeeb’... I have no qualms about being me. I have never looked for your acceptance; I have never looked for you to approve of my being! Yet I have looked for people to be by my side, to understand the unsaid and to know that beneath that cover, beneath that shell of indifference, is a girl, a not-so-young girl, not so courageous, not so bold... who wants nothings from you but a smile! Who wants you to understand that she has dreams too, she has expectations... she has plans for her life! She’ll soon be starting over again, and till she reaches this stage again, she’ll be nearing the end of her life... she has dreams to live, that would be too worn out and faded by the time she reaches this score in the second innings of her life!
And she needs to do something soon! Because it’s time for the curtains to fall, on the first half of her life!
A lot of people achieve a lot in these 25 years... they set goals, reach up to the set aims... get a good job, start a business, buy their first cars, fall in and out of love, get married, start a family, for the first time sponsor their trips.. Others make space for their hobbies, shower time and material on their parents and siblings, spend on comforts and live a life!
Most of the 25 year olds, if not already there, at least know where they are headed.
I have a done a lot of those things too! But I think I still have no aim that I have to achieve... I have no goals that have to be converted! I have no mark that needs to be crossed!
And no, don’t take me wrong! The last quarter of my life has been very happening, very dynamic and to me, pretty satisfying! Am content with what all I’ve done in those 25 years!
I have been a high achiever, I have been a mediocre, and I’ve been a loser too!
I’ve been loved, I’ve been liked, I’ve been hated, I’ve been loathed!..
I’ve been desired, I’ve been ignored!
I’ve been happy, I’ve been sad!
I’ve shed tears in pain, I have cried in happiness!
I’ve lost people to death; I’ve found jewels in birth!
I’ve been cheated on, I’ve had my back watched!
I’ve been tricked, I’ve been treated!
I’ve been my dad's princess, my mom's pride... I’ve even put them both to shame.
Been stingy, been a spendthrift
Been mean, been sweet
There are so many bucket lists out there telling you what you ought to have done in life by now!
I don’t care what they say, yet I know they talk about living a carefree life!
When I think of things I would have wanted to do by now, I don’t have regrets!
If I say I have no regrets, and I have been pretty satisfied with my life so far, why is it that I call it a quarter life crisis?!
Because I somewhere know that there are things for which I’ll be too old very soon!
There are some that only I could do something about, and there are some only you could do something about!
• I have nothing that I am a master at! Am a jack of many trades, but nothing that I command!
• I have for long considered round a shape, it’s now or never that I could experiment with another
• I have no identified strengths
• I haven’t yet taken my revenge, she’ll be too old to harm soon
• I haven’t painted my master piece yet!
• I haven’t bungee jumped!
• I haven’t been on a walk to see undersea life
• I haven’t made it to a first class basketball team
• I really haven’t stood up enough for me
• There is still a language I need to learn
• My time freezing machine is still in blueprint stage
• I still don’t have that room with a bean bag and lots of canvases, the empty coffee mugs and the window that looks over to unending green space
It’s this year, or I never ever will get a chance to do this, any which way!
But more than what I could have done, I have desires that would look foolish beyond a certain age
• As much as I love surprises, I haven’t braced a single one till today
• Pampering that I would have loved being a girl, a daughter, a girlfriend: the gifts, the walks, the candle lights, the pride, the presents, the understood ties!
• The orchids, the birds of paradise, the cut flower roses and the tulips that would soothe all eyes
I’ve been happy being me, being different, and being ‘ajeeb’... I have no qualms about being me. I have never looked for your acceptance; I have never looked for you to approve of my being! Yet I have looked for people to be by my side, to understand the unsaid and to know that beneath that cover, beneath that shell of indifference, is a girl, a not-so-young girl, not so courageous, not so bold... who wants nothings from you but a smile! Who wants you to understand that she has dreams too, she has expectations... she has plans for her life! She’ll soon be starting over again, and till she reaches this stage again, she’ll be nearing the end of her life... she has dreams to live, that would be too worn out and faded by the time she reaches this score in the second innings of her life!
And she needs to do something soon! Because it’s time for the curtains to fall, on the first half of her life!
